It’s that kind of feelings once again. . .

Looking into your eyes… I saw helpless and the urge… but it’s still calm. . . too calm. . .

I’m sorriees. . . looking into your eyes, I felt guilty. . . I also felt an urge to hold you and to give you a hug. . . I’m sorriees for having hurt you so much. . . too much indeed. . . In a nutshell, I’m not worthy for you. . . you’re not bad, you have standards. . . this makes me even more not worthy for you. . . I’m so ugly and am getting fatter and fatter. . . now you understand why I always tell you I’m not worthy for you? If you’re still waiting. . . still don’t wanna let go. . . I think it’s wiser for you to start changing your mindset? you can definitely find a much more better one than me. . . one that will love you as much as you will love. . . wouldn’t that be better? It’s fairer for you that way too. . .

Always remember. . . I’m not worthy for you. . . I cannot accept you to hurt you again. . . I won’t bear to do it again. . . or to do it anymore. . .

I know I have no rights to think for you, to choose for you, and to decide what you are going to decide. . . but it’s just my opinions, accept it huh?

Nothing can take my guilt away. . . I’m sorriees for what I have done to you. . . at least I’m glad we still talk. . . not much but at least we talk. . . don’t avoid me. . . it will only increase my guilt. . . if you love me, lessen my guilt and don’t add on to it anymore. . .

Remember I told you our definition to relationship is different? My definition to maintain a relationship is to LEARN TO FLY A KITE. . . how? Flying a kite means to pull and let go at the right time. . . this is to ensure that the kite will be able to fly higher and higher. . . . . .

That’s the relationship that I desire to have. . .

sorriees zhi wen. . .